Death is a Farmer

5/30/2023

Dear Diary:

Today we visited the Sahara Desert. I severely underestimated the insane heat that would bombard me from all sides. Here is my recount of the day.

Act 1 (50 calories):

Woke up this morning to a nice, cool room and headed downstairs to grab my daily two slices of bread and liquid. It is a hard day ahead in the mines, and I’m grateful that the company provides us bots with the proper nutrition to work tirelessly in the fields. Don’t worry, I savored each slice throughly.

Act 2 (Chocolate or Vanilla)

I’m a chocolate man. Or am I a Vanilla Man? The eternal debate that almost rivals Lebron vs Jordan. A guaranteed way to immediately start a fight in New York City. One thing I do know however is that the Vanilla farm that we visited had some absolutely banging vanilla buns. Oh and we also learned about more about the solar panels/water salination issues. But clearly the buns were more important. Vanilla Buns.

Act 3 (Death)

Guangcai Wetland? More like Guangcai Deathland. When I stepped off the bus I immediately knew that my time was up. It was inevitable. All I could ask was for the father to forgive me for my sins. I listened in on the informative talk about the solar panels and sustainability as I watched as death slowly approach me from afar. I closed my eyes and basked in the unbearable heat. It was a good life.

But just as he was about to take me, I was suddenly pulled back into the safe zone where I was handed lunch. Ah, but I can still see him watching me. Luckily he can’t enter past the line for I will live another day.

Act 4 (Fans)

As we arrived to the Wengfeng Seawater Supply Station, I nervously looked around for Death. Weirdly enough, I couldn’t see him in my Lambo, but as soon as I got off, it was apparent that I was not in the clear. As we learned about the Station and got a tour of the factory/facilities, I clutched my anti-death fans and shook them (quite literally) for my life. What we learned was super cool, but I wish everything else was super cool instead (get it? cuz it was hot). As I tried my best to stave off what seemed like the inevitable, I managed to clutch it out like Jordan in Game 6 and made it back to the Ferrari. One more stop. Come at me.

Act 5 (Shrimp Teriyaki)

Weichen Energy Indoor Aquafarm. Try saying that 10 times really fast. We arrived and immediately was put into a room where we had a nice information/conversation/question session with the owner. He had inherited that land from his stepfather. Notice how I’m not mentioning any of the details from before. This was because we had AC. I heard AC stands for “Another Chance” and it was what saved me from Death taking me away into the void.

Act 6 (Singing)

We sang on the bus. Everybody had great voices. Harmony and sound. End Scene

-Thanks for listening to me diary. It was a fun day. Weirdly, I never realized the Sahara Desert was in Taiwan. You learn something new everyday am I right?

-fin-


-Jay Chung